NOVELTIES & MISC TOYS

Play The Piston Flute

Or the Swanee whistle. Whatever you call it, this little slide whistle (just consider it the smallest trombone in the universe) has an outsized musical history. No elevator has ever fallen in a cartoon without its accompaniment, and no jug band is complete without one, but Louis Armstrong also played one on his Hot Five recordings, and Ravel even required one in an opera score. In assorted plastic colors with a steel slide, 6-7/8" long x 1/2" dia.

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SLIDE WHISTLE

Play The Piston Flute

Or the Swanee whistle. Whatever you call it, this little slide whistle (just consider it the smallest trombone in the universe) has an outsized musical history. No elevator has ever fallen in a cartoon without its accompaniment, and no jug band is complete without one, but Louis Armstrong also played one on his Hot Five recordings, and Ravel even required one in an opera score. In assorted plastic colors with a steel slide, 6-7/8" long x 1/2" dia.

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$3.75 EACH

Coin-Snatching Kitty

Stick a coin on top of the fishy plate on this plastic coin bank and it triggers a Hiya Kitty inside to mew some cat noises, then peeks out and reaches out a paw to snatch the coin. The box, which is mysteriously made to look like a fruit crate, measures 4-3/4" x 4" x 3-1/2". You’ll need to add a couple of “AA” batteries but that’s the standard price of kitten cuteness today.

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BATTERY OPERATED KITTY COIN BANK

Coin-Snatching Kitty

Stick a coin on top of the fishy plate on this plastic coin bank and it triggers a Hiya Kitty inside to mew some cat noises, then peeks out and reaches out a paw to snatch the coin. The box, which is mysteriously made to look like a fruit crate, measures 4-3/4" x 4" x 3-1/2". You’ll need to add a couple of “AA” batteries but that’s the standard price of kitten cuteness today.

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$13.65 EACH

Feeling A Little Cranky?

Here's a little music box to crank. These are really cute, with a very nice sound, and they're in clear acrylic cases so you, or impressionable youngsters, can watch them work. They measure 2-1/4"x 2" x 1-1/4" with a 7/8" crank. We'll pick one that plays When You Wish upon a Star, Row, Row, Row your Boat, Brahms' Lullaby, or Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star. We won't pick the one that plays the score from Die Walküre because the wheel is just enormous.

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ASSORTED HAND CRANK MUSIC BOX MOVEMENTS

Feeling A Little Cranky?

Here's a little music box to crank. These are really cute, with a very nice sound, and they're in clear acrylic cases so you, or impressionable youngsters, can watch them work. They measure 2-1/4"x 2" x 1-1/4" with a 7/8" crank. We'll pick one that plays When You Wish upon a Star, Row, Row, Row your Boat, Brahms' Lullaby, or Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star. We won't pick the one that plays the score from Die Walküre because the wheel is just enormous.

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$5.95 EACH

Yes And No

No maybes. Our each is a set of matching “YES” and “NO” buttons, a little over 3" in dia, like on quiz shows. When smacked, they recite one of (10) variations on the theme, as in “No, no, no, no” or “Yes, baby.” or “For the last time, NO.” Perfect for arbitrary decision-making at work and excellent for responding to requests from teens. You add a couple of “AAA” batteries and the buttons do the rest.

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TALKING YES-NO BUTTONS

Yes And No

No maybes. Our each is a set of matching “YES” and “NO” buttons, a little over 3" in dia, like on quiz shows. When smacked, they recite one of (10) variations on the theme, as in “No, no, no, no” or “Yes, baby.” or “For the last time, NO.” Perfect for arbitrary decision-making at work and excellent for responding to requests from teens. You add a couple of “AAA” batteries and the buttons do the rest.

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$9.75 EACH

Underpants In A Can!

Emergency underpants in a can. Says it all, doesn't it? Quite stretchable in a Tyvekish white fabric, "one pair fits most adults." They're hip-hugger, semi-bikini, translucent type drawers, so despite the smiling man wearing them and a red bow-tie on the can, some (insecure) guys might find these just a touch jeune fille-ish. "Safe, Sanitary, Secure." Says so right on the 3" x 1-1/2" x 2/3" flip-top metal can. Better buy (3) in case of a long weekend.

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CANNED EMERGENCY 1-SIZE UNDERPANTS

Underpants In A Can!

Emergency underpants in a can. Says it all, doesn't it? Quite stretchable in a Tyvekish white fabric, "one pair fits most adults." They're hip-hugger, semi-bikini, translucent type drawers, so despite the smiling man wearing them and a red bow-tie on the can, some (insecure) guys might find these just a touch jeune fille-ish. "Safe, Sanitary, Secure." Says so right on the 3" x 1-1/2" x 2/3" flip-top metal can. Better buy (3) in case of a long weekend.

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$4.45 EACH
$4.95
-10%

Soprano in C

Special for your beginner tootler. Our black (ABS plastic) soprano recorder measures 12-5/8" long and includes a plastic carrying case, cleaning rod, and a sheet of fingering instructions.

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RECORDER FLUTE

Soprano in C

Special for your beginner tootler. Our black (ABS plastic) soprano recorder measures 12-5/8" long and includes a plastic carrying case, cleaning rod, and a sheet of fingering instructions.

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$3.75 EACH

Not Your Grandmother's Postcards

This whimsical pack of (30) postcards measures, unsurprisingly, post-card size 5-3/4" x 3-15/16", with non-duplicating images of gravy and bacon, Nikola Tesla, narwhals, spontaneous human combustion, boxing kangaroos, infinity and taxidermy, among many others of that ilk. Those ilks. Whatever--just buy 'em and stop asking so many questions. Blurbs on the back.

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SCIENCE AND WHIMSICAL POSTCARDS

Not Your Grandmother's Postcards

This whimsical pack of (30) postcards measures, unsurprisingly, post-card size 5-3/4" x 3-15/16", with non-duplicating images of gravy and bacon, Nikola Tesla, narwhals, spontaneous human combustion, boxing kangaroos, infinity and taxidermy, among many others of that ilk. Those ilks. Whatever--just buy 'em and stop asking so many questions. Blurbs on the back.

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$8.85 EACH

Rattlesnake Egg Magnets

Or singing suppositories. The pair is very magnetic, whatever they are. The 1-3/4" long prolate spheroids look like highly polished black hematites. Hold them an inch apart in your palm, toss 'em into the air and listen to them make a sound like the cyber-crickets. Or an electrocuted chicken. The manufacturer suggests keeping these mega-magnets away from computers, pacemakers, TV sets and credit cards.

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MAGNETIC RATTLESNAKE EGG

Rattlesnake Egg Magnets

Or singing suppositories. The pair is very magnetic, whatever they are. The 1-3/4" long prolate spheroids look like highly polished black hematites. Hold them an inch apart in your palm, toss 'em into the air and listen to them make a sound like the cyber-crickets. Or an electrocuted chicken. The manufacturer suggests keeping these mega-magnets away from computers, pacemakers, TV sets and credit cards.

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$1.95 EACH

Makin' Whoopee...

is best done with the sacred mother of all novelty items, the original Whoopee Cushion. Marlon Brando owned one. Of course he did, they're both American classics, except the cushion was born in Toronto. Ours is the classic 8" version.

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WHOOPEE CUSHION

Makin' Whoopee...

is best done with the sacred mother of all novelty items, the original Whoopee Cushion. Marlon Brando owned one. Of course he did, they're both American classics, except the cushion was born in Toronto. Ours is the classic 8" version.

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$2.50 EACH

Back To Basics

It could have been called an Alabama Buzzer after Alabama Vest, the man who invented it. Or a Clegghorn, after Thaddeus Von Clegg, the clock master who fabricated the first one. But the hand-crafted 4-3/4" long steel instrument was a simple amusement, and the 1840s were a simple time. So it's simply a kazoo.

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ORIGINAL STYLE METAL KAZOO

Back To Basics

It could have been called an Alabama Buzzer after Alabama Vest, the man who invented it. Or a Clegghorn, after Thaddeus Von Clegg, the clock master who fabricated the first one. But the hand-crafted 4-3/4" long steel instrument was a simple amusement, and the 1840s were a simple time. So it's simply a kazoo.

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$2.95 EACH

You Kazoo?

Us too, but then who doesn’t kazoo? These 5" long classic steel kazoos have 1-1/8” resonators, and come in (16) festive patterns. We’ll pick one because, really, who do you know who’s more festive than we are.

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ASSORTED-COLOR KAZOOS

You Kazoo?

Us too, but then who doesn’t kazoo? These 5" long classic steel kazoos have 1-1/8” resonators, and come in (16) festive patterns. We’ll pick one because, really, who do you know who’s more festive than we are.

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$2.65 EACH

Flexi-Sphere

Interesting wire contraption that we played with as a child. A series of (4) tiers of overlapping and intertwined brass wire semicircular hoops are anchored at the open end to a pair of full circles. The whole can be shaped into a tube, double balls, a flower petal, etc, depending upon what areas are opened, which closed. A variety of colored beads on the hoops add a decorative touch. Fun, intriguing and decorative all at the same time.

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FLEXI-SPHERE DESK TOY

Flexi-Sphere

Interesting wire contraption that we played with as a child. A series of (4) tiers of overlapping and intertwined brass wire semicircular hoops are anchored at the open end to a pair of full circles. The whole can be shaped into a tube, double balls, a flower petal, etc, depending upon what areas are opened, which closed. A variety of colored beads on the hoops add a decorative touch. Fun, intriguing and decorative all at the same time.

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$4.95 EACH

Double The Whoopee

We’re proud as can be to offer the world’s largest whoopee cushion--twice as big as the original for a nation whose bottom line has doubled since the original cushion was invented nearly 100 years ago. We call that progress. Your cushion, at approx a foot in diameter, will arrive folded in half. If your whoopie cushion has to be folded in half to be shipped, you know it’s big. And yes, the whoop is twice as loud, too.

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EXTRA LARGE RUBBER WHOOPIE CUSHION

Double The Whoopee

We’re proud as can be to offer the world’s largest whoopee cushion--twice as big as the original for a nation whose bottom line has doubled since the original cushion was invented nearly 100 years ago. We call that progress. Your cushion, at approx a foot in diameter, will arrive folded in half. If your whoopie cushion has to be folded in half to be shipped, you know it’s big. And yes, the whoop is twice as loud, too.

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$6.25 EACH

Pay The Pooch

Drop some coins into this dog's dish and watch him get all wiggly wacky with barely controlled excitement while he gobbles your change and stores it in the base of the bank. You add a pair of "AA" batteries because animatronic dogs don't eat Alpo®. Pup is 3-1/2" tall on a 5-7/8" x 3-1/8" x 2-1/2" base. We'll pick a pup from our litter of assorted mongrels.

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ELECTRIC DOGGIE BANK

Pay The Pooch

Drop some coins into this dog's dish and watch him get all wiggly wacky with barely controlled excitement while he gobbles your change and stores it in the base of the bank. You add a pair of "AA" batteries because animatronic dogs don't eat Alpo®. Pup is 3-1/2" tall on a 5-7/8" x 3-1/8" x 2-1/2" base. We'll pick a pup from our litter of assorted mongrels.

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$14.50 EACH
$15.95
-9%

Wanna Tie A Banana In A Knot?

It’s a proven stress reliever, banana knotting, and you can participate with our mega-squishy stress banana. Measures 6” long but will stretch to a couple feet. Filled with stress-relieving gel beads, and will take a good long time to return to its original banana shape, which just adds to your relief.

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SQUEEZABLE BANANA STRESS-RELIEVER

Wanna Tie A Banana In A Knot?

It’s a proven stress reliever, banana knotting, and you can participate with our mega-squishy stress banana. Measures 6” long but will stretch to a couple feet. Filled with stress-relieving gel beads, and will take a good long time to return to its original banana shape, which just adds to your relief.

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$4.85 EACH

Jaw Harp...The Dentist's Friend

Plunk your magic twanger and call yourself froggy. This 3-5/8" long steel jaw harp, or mouth harp, is technically a plucked idiophone, but don't say that in Nashville. Includes playing instructions. Pay no attention to that vibration in your head.

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STEEL JAW HARP

Jaw Harp...The Dentist's Friend

Plunk your magic twanger and call yourself froggy. This 3-5/8" long steel jaw harp, or mouth harp, is technically a plucked idiophone, but don't say that in Nashville. Includes playing instructions. Pay no attention to that vibration in your head.

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$6.95 EACH

Puff the Magic AirZooka

Great balls of air! The mighty AIRZOOKA is back--and as cool as ever! Looking like a plastic bucket with a handle and a flip-up gun sight, it blasts a puff of air up to 50 feet. Blow out candles from across the room (and avoid spitting on birthday cakes), spook the cat, disperse bugs, take target practice at styrofoam cups or buy a pair and play air-tag. Measures roughly 11” tall x 11” dia in bright green or ninja-ish black plastic (We'll pick from what's currently available.) and is, frankly, much more fun than you would imagine. Ages 6+.

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AIR CANNON

Puff the Magic AirZooka

Great balls of air! The mighty AIRZOOKA is back--and as cool as ever! Looking like a plastic bucket with a handle and a flip-up gun sight, it blasts a puff of air up to 50 feet. Blow out candles from across the room (and avoid spitting on birthday cakes), spook the cat, disperse bugs, take target practice at styrofoam cups or buy a pair and play air-tag. Measures roughly 11” tall x 11” dia in bright green or ninja-ish black plastic (We'll pick from what's currently available.) and is, frankly, much more fun than you would imagine. Ages 6+.

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$20.95 EACH

The Buzzer Of Joy

The original Joy Buzzer was called the Joke Buzzer (1932 U.S. patent #1845735, Soren Adams) and it replaced the more dangerous Zapper, which is lost to time, more's the pity. Our standard wind-up model is a 1-3/8" dia circle of perennial vibrating fun, with a 7/8" dia finger loop. (Watch for the solar-powered joy buzzer, still under development.)

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HAND-HELD JOY BUZZER

The Buzzer Of Joy

The original Joy Buzzer was called the Joke Buzzer (1932 U.S. patent #1845735, Soren Adams) and it replaced the more dangerous Zapper, which is lost to time, more's the pity. Our standard wind-up model is a 1-3/8" dia circle of perennial vibrating fun, with a 7/8" dia finger loop. (Watch for the solar-powered joy buzzer, still under development.)

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$4.75 EACH

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