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KITCHEN GOODS

Not For Big Mouths

A lovely mini-funnel, made for pouring Dad's special medicine into a hip flask, but just dandy for filling salt and pepper shakers or anything else with a little yap. Stainless steel with a 1-3/8" ID intake mouth and a 5/16" ID outlet. 1-7/8" tall OA.

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SMALL STAINLESS STEEL KITCHEN FUNNEL

Not For Big Mouths

A lovely mini-funnel, made for pouring Dad's special medicine into a hip flask, but just dandy for filling salt and pepper shakers or anything else with a little yap. Stainless steel with a 1-3/8" ID intake mouth and a 5/16" ID outlet. 1-7/8" tall OA.

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$1.75 EACH

Can Colander

Stop pushing those tin-can tops with your thumb, trying to drain the juice from your beans. Get this mega-clever strainer, graduated to fit most standard cans without spilling or cutting your thumb again. Paul calls it pea-perfect, and it’s great with pineapple chunks. Measures 4-1/2" dia, and it’s stepped down three times to 2-1/4” dia, on a 4-1/2” long handle. Stainless steel and dishwasher safe.

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MULTI-SIZE FOOD CAN STRAINER

Can Colander

Stop pushing those tin-can tops with your thumb, trying to drain the juice from your beans. Get this mega-clever strainer, graduated to fit most standard cans without spilling or cutting your thumb again. Paul calls it pea-perfect, and it’s great with pineapple chunks. Measures 4-1/2" dia, and it’s stepped down three times to 2-1/4” dia, on a 4-1/2” long handle. Stainless steel and dishwasher safe.

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$5.75 EACH

Put A Penguin In Your Fridge

And it’ll never smell like leftover pork lo mein again. The fridge, that is. We love this 4” tall penguin in the traditional black and white outfit just for the way it looks. But pull off the black silicone top, and fill the hard plastic bottom with baking soda, and the little bugger will deodorize your ice box for no additional charge.

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PENGUIN REFRIGERATOR DEODORIZER

Put A Penguin In Your Fridge

And it’ll never smell like leftover pork lo mein again. The fridge, that is. We love this 4” tall penguin in the traditional black and white outfit just for the way it looks. But pull off the black silicone top, and fill the hard plastic bottom with baking soda, and the little bugger will deodorize your ice box for no additional charge.

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$2.99 EACH
$3.95
-24%

Flat Mats

Let's cut to the chase here -- buy these the first time you read this, or they're going to be gone! There aren't that many of these flexible chopping mats, and the versatile 15" x 12" x 0.024" thick mats are not only ideal for small kitchens where every inch counts, they're great for any kitchen, and for cookouts, camping and picnics. Our each is a set of (2) of the translucent Euro-look mats that protect countertops from sharp knives and fresh-from-the-oven cookies, and protect food from outdoor surfaces. They can be lifted and slightly folded to funnel chopped food neatly into a pot. They're dishwasher safe, and roll up for portage or storage.

OUR SURPIE POLICE SAY: Due to our sale pricing MAX ORDER QUANTITY IS (5) Per Order. Any more and your order will fail in the shopping cart.

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CHOPPING MATS

Flat Mats

Let's cut to the chase here -- buy these the first time you read this, or they're going to be gone! There aren't that many of these flexible chopping mats, and the versatile 15" x 12" x 0.024" thick mats are not only ideal for small kitchens where every inch counts, they're great for any kitchen, and for cookouts, camping and picnics. Our each is a set of (2) of the translucent Euro-look mats that protect countertops from sharp knives and fresh-from-the-oven cookies, and protect food from outdoor surfaces. They can be lifted and slightly folded to funnel chopped food neatly into a pot. They're dishwasher safe, and roll up for portage or storage.

OUR SURPIE POLICE SAY: Due to our sale pricing MAX ORDER QUANTITY IS (5) Per Order. Any more and your order will fail in the shopping cart.

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$2.25 EACH

Goodness Gracious, Great Balls Of Ice

That’s the little-known B-side of Great Balls of Fire. It’s also this mold for making 1-3/4” dia ice balls just like they put in those cocktails that cost $25 in places that pretend they're speakeasies. The mold is made of black food-grade silicone, approx 4-1/2” x 4” and makes (4) balls at a time. Goodness gracious! Surplus factor: ignore the 2” dia misprint on the package. The balls also make good catapult ammo for laying siege to snow forts.

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SILICONE ICE BALL MOLD

Goodness Gracious, Great Balls Of Ice

That’s the little-known B-side of Great Balls of Fire. It’s also this mold for making 1-3/4” dia ice balls just like they put in those cocktails that cost $25 in places that pretend they're speakeasies. The mold is made of black food-grade silicone, approx 4-1/2” x 4” and makes (4) balls at a time. Goodness gracious! Surplus factor: ignore the 2” dia misprint on the package. The balls also make good catapult ammo for laying siege to snow forts.

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$7.50 EACH

Ceramic Is The New Steel

The smart cutters and choppers these days are using ceramic knives because they stay so sharp for so long, and who remembers to have their knives sharpened? Ours measure 7" long over all, with a red, green, or deep aqua handle, a 3" blade and a sheath. Don't go into the kitchen without one. Slice, dice, chop and mince, and forget about sharpening. Like you always do.

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7" CERAMIC BLADE CUTTING KNIFE

Ceramic Is The New Steel

The smart cutters and choppers these days are using ceramic knives because they stay so sharp for so long, and who remembers to have their knives sharpened? Ours measure 7" long over all, with a red, green, or deep aqua handle, a 3" blade and a sheath. Don't go into the kitchen without one. Slice, dice, chop and mince, and forget about sharpening. Like you always do.

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$7.50 EACH

Whisk Like A Yankee

Just like the classic Yankee drill, but for the kitchen. Has that “as seen on the television” kinda feel. You push the silver or rubberized handle, our choice, of this 14” long spring-loaded whisk and it spins clockwise on the push, and reverses when you let up on it. The 10-tine head is 2.4” dia at the bottom x 2.25” long, with a little center pin to keep it off the bottom of the bowl or jar or whatever. In stainless steel. NOTE: The advertised smaller whisk is no longer available. We only have the larger 14" long whisk. Sorry for any inconvenience.


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SPRING-LOADED SPINNING KITCHEN WHISK

Whisk Like A Yankee

Just like the classic Yankee drill, but for the kitchen. Has that “as seen on the television” kinda feel. You push the silver or rubberized handle, our choice, of this 14” long spring-loaded whisk and it spins clockwise on the push, and reverses when you let up on it. The 10-tine head is 2.4” dia at the bottom x 2.25” long, with a little center pin to keep it off the bottom of the bowl or jar or whatever. In stainless steel. NOTE: The advertised smaller whisk is no longer available. We only have the larger 14" long whisk. Sorry for any inconvenience.


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$3.50 EACH
$4.50
-22%

13” Flat Screen For $12.50!

Small for a TV but perfect for keeping the bacon grease from spattering all over your kitchen, and for straining pasta over the sink. Cineastes will recall seeing Jack Lemmon using a tennis racket for just this purpose in The Apartment, but we think those holes are too big. Our proper strainer measures 13” dia in finely woven and reinforced stainless-steel mesh. Get a pair so you can always play a little post-prandial kitchen badminton.

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13” STAINLESS STEEL SPLATTER SCREEN

13” Flat Screen For $12.50!

Small for a TV but perfect for keeping the bacon grease from spattering all over your kitchen, and for straining pasta over the sink. Cineastes will recall seeing Jack Lemmon using a tennis racket for just this purpose in The Apartment, but we think those holes are too big. Our proper strainer measures 13” dia in finely woven and reinforced stainless-steel mesh. Get a pair so you can always play a little post-prandial kitchen badminton.

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$8.50 EACH
$12.50
-32%

Four Funnels

Four fine funnels, a fantastic fare. Sturdy plastic, the biggest is 4-1/8" dia at the mouth, with a 1/2" dia spout, the smallest has a 1-7/8" dia mouth, 1/4" spout. The other (2) are in between. Frankly, it's freaky fun flowing fluids from four funnels!

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SET OF 4 PLASTIC FUNNELS

Four Funnels

Four fine funnels, a fantastic fare. Sturdy plastic, the biggest is 4-1/8" dia at the mouth, with a 1/2" dia spout, the smallest has a 1-7/8" dia mouth, 1/4" spout. The other (2) are in between. Frankly, it's freaky fun flowing fluids from four funnels!

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$2.65 EACH

Rotten Peaches?

Not if you store them in this double produce basket with wide-open bottoms to let air circulate and prevent mushy fruit. In bright chrome, it measures 14-3/4" x 14-1/4" x 11" tall with a 10” x 9” top basket and an 11” x 11” bottom. Both baskets swing, like banana hammocks, and we know how much bananas like to swing. Kiwis and green peppers, too. Half the retail price, and no need to thank us. A tiny bit of assembly required.

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FRUIT AND VEGETABLE STORAGE BASKET

Rotten Peaches?

Not if you store them in this double produce basket with wide-open bottoms to let air circulate and prevent mushy fruit. In bright chrome, it measures 14-3/4" x 14-1/4" x 11" tall with a 10” x 9” top basket and an 11” x 11” bottom. Both baskets swing, like banana hammocks, and we know how much bananas like to swing. Kiwis and green peppers, too. Half the retail price, and no need to thank us. A tiny bit of assembly required.

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$13.50 EACH

Not The Sharpest Knife In The Drawer?

Not you—we were talking to your favorite kitchen knife, or the one that used to be your favorite before it got dull, and it said yes, it’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer. It’s depressed, and it wants you to buy this Mozzbi tungsten and ceramic 2-stage sharpener. Self-adjusting for anything from paring knives to chef’s choppers, it can be used on any straight knife. A few pulls through the coarse side, and same on the fine side, and you’ll be slicing like d’Artagnan through Cardinal Richelieu's guards. Too soon?

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SELF-ADJUSTING KNIFE SHARPENER

Not The Sharpest Knife In The Drawer?

Not you—we were talking to your favorite kitchen knife, or the one that used to be your favorite before it got dull, and it said yes, it’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer. It’s depressed, and it wants you to buy this Mozzbi tungsten and ceramic 2-stage sharpener. Self-adjusting for anything from paring knives to chef’s choppers, it can be used on any straight knife. A few pulls through the coarse side, and same on the fine side, and you’ll be slicing like d’Artagnan through Cardinal Richelieu's guards. Too soon?

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$9.50 EACH

Fooooooooooooooooooork

This is a standard 4-tine fork with a non-slip handle to prevent fork tragedies, except that if you pull the end, it extends like an antenna from 10” to over 2 feet long. Called The Moocher, it's made for stealing food from your extended family's plates. Across the table. But seriously, it's quite solid even when fully extended, so we'd roast wienies or marshmallows with it, or toast crumpets in the fireplace in our Oxford digs if we ever get a Rhodes Scholarship.

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EXTENDABLE FORK 10” TO 2 FEET

Fooooooooooooooooooork

This is a standard 4-tine fork with a non-slip handle to prevent fork tragedies, except that if you pull the end, it extends like an antenna from 10” to over 2 feet long. Called The Moocher, it's made for stealing food from your extended family's plates. Across the table. But seriously, it's quite solid even when fully extended, so we'd roast wienies or marshmallows with it, or toast crumpets in the fireplace in our Oxford digs if we ever get a Rhodes Scholarship.

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$4.95 EACH

Tap Into This

This Lighthouse H2O filtering water pitcher is BPA-free, holds 3-2/3 quarts (that’s 3-1/2 liters) and measures approx 11-1/2” tall x 10-1/3” deep x 5-7/8” wide. Filters out solids, heavy metals, pesticides, toxins and chlorine, and then alkalizes the water to a healthy 8.5-10 pH with a pure, silky taste. Includes (2) 6-stage, screw-in filter cartridges with replacement indicators. Filters last for about 60 days each and are available all over the internets. On the Web, this pitcher sells for 50% more. Just sayin’. At this price buy a few just for the 2-filters. 

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3-2/3 QUART ALKALINE WATER-FILTERING PITCHER

Tap Into This

This Lighthouse H2O filtering water pitcher is BPA-free, holds 3-2/3 quarts (that’s 3-1/2 liters) and measures approx 11-1/2” tall x 10-1/3” deep x 5-7/8” wide. Filters out solids, heavy metals, pesticides, toxins and chlorine, and then alkalizes the water to a healthy 8.5-10 pH with a pure, silky taste. Includes (2) 6-stage, screw-in filter cartridges with replacement indicators. Filters last for about 60 days each and are available all over the internets. On the Web, this pitcher sells for 50% more. Just sayin’. At this price buy a few just for the 2-filters. 

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$12.50 EACH
$17.50
-29%

Measuring Matryoshkas

These cuties are like Russian nesting dolls, except they have kewpie-ish faces and they're a set of measuring cups. In all-white, heavy, food-safe plastic, the tops hold 1, 2/3, and 1/3 cup, and the bottoms hold ¾, ½, and ¼ cup, all labeled inside. Pat says they'll “doll up your kitchen,” but the rest of us don’t like to encourage that sort of humor. Aw, who are we kidding—of course we do!

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NESTING DOLL MEASURING CUPS

Measuring Matryoshkas

These cuties are like Russian nesting dolls, except they have kewpie-ish faces and they're a set of measuring cups. In all-white, heavy, food-safe plastic, the tops hold 1, 2/3, and 1/3 cup, and the bottoms hold ¾, ½, and ¼ cup, all labeled inside. Pat says they'll “doll up your kitchen,” but the rest of us don’t like to encourage that sort of humor. Aw, who are we kidding—of course we do!

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$11.95 EACH

Save The Tables

These silicone hot pads double as trivets or oven mitts. Measure 7-1/8" dia x 3/16" thick with 1/4" honeycomb indentations to further dissipate heat, plus a 3/8” hole near the edge so you can hang them up. We’ll pick one in red, blue, green or orange, and you can redecorate your kitchen to match. They also double as the world’s safest frizbees.

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SILICONE HOT PAD DISCS

Save The Tables

These silicone hot pads double as trivets or oven mitts. Measure 7-1/8" dia x 3/16" thick with 1/4" honeycomb indentations to further dissipate heat, plus a 3/8” hole near the edge so you can hang them up. We’ll pick one in red, blue, green or orange, and you can redecorate your kitchen to match. They also double as the world’s safest frizbees.

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$2.25 EACH

Silicone Bear Molds

Make your own silicone bears! The 7-1/2” x 5” molds are silicone, and they make (50) tiny, chewy bears, each in the gummy standard of 3/4” tall—and you’ll get (2) molds so you can make (100) bears at a time. (Hip yourself to the Internets, of course, for chewy gummy recipes.) Silicone is non-stick, heat- and cold-resistant, and both freezer- and oven-safe up to 450F degrees, so you can make frozen and baked bears. Also dishwasher-safe. Includes a small dropper for filling the molds, and the manufacturer doesn't mention it, but we wonder if, as an homage to your grandmother, you might be able to make teeny tiny ursine Jell-O molds.

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CHEWY BEAR SILICONE TRAY MOLDS

Silicone Bear Molds

Make your own silicone bears! The 7-1/2” x 5” molds are silicone, and they make (50) tiny, chewy bears, each in the gummy standard of 3/4” tall—and you’ll get (2) molds so you can make (100) bears at a time. (Hip yourself to the Internets, of course, for chewy gummy recipes.) Silicone is non-stick, heat- and cold-resistant, and both freezer- and oven-safe up to 450F degrees, so you can make frozen and baked bears. Also dishwasher-safe. Includes a small dropper for filling the molds, and the manufacturer doesn't mention it, but we wonder if, as an homage to your grandmother, you might be able to make teeny tiny ursine Jell-O molds.

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$5.85 EACH
$8.50
-31%

Make Like Moses Cook

That’s who the Internets say invented the apple peeler in 1803, but there are a bunch of contenders, so never mind. Just get this hand-cranked peeler and corer and start cranking. This one has a chromed threaded shaft, a three-pronged spike, and is spring-loaded, so it adjusts to fit your apples. Mounts on a 4” dia suction base so it’s just dandy for today’s granite counter tops. Measures approx 12” long, and frankly, it doesn’t care if you use it for potatoes, either. Also provides a non-digital source of amusement for children.

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APPLE PEELER AND CORER

Make Like Moses Cook

That’s who the Internets say invented the apple peeler in 1803, but there are a bunch of contenders, so never mind. Just get this hand-cranked peeler and corer and start cranking. This one has a chromed threaded shaft, a three-pronged spike, and is spring-loaded, so it adjusts to fit your apples. Mounts on a 4” dia suction base so it’s just dandy for today’s granite counter tops. Measures approx 12” long, and frankly, it doesn’t care if you use it for potatoes, either. Also provides a non-digital source of amusement for children.

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$15.95 EACH

The Naked Dinosaur Mug

Sure, all dinosaurs were naked, but this 14-oz ceramic mug with a green exterior and white inside lets you see under their skin. Featuring pics of multiple dinos on the outside, when you pour in hot liquid, they shed their skin to show their skeletons. Probably some very simple science is involved, but it looks like magic to kids and copywriters. Measures 3-1/2" tall x 3-3/4" dia, with plenty of room for marshmallows. Dinosaurs loved marshmallows—that’s why a lot of them lived in marshes.

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HEAT-SENSITIVE MORPHING DINOSAUR SKELETON MUG

The Naked Dinosaur Mug

Sure, all dinosaurs were naked, but this 14-oz ceramic mug with a green exterior and white inside lets you see under their skin. Featuring pics of multiple dinos on the outside, when you pour in hot liquid, they shed their skin to show their skeletons. Probably some very simple science is involved, but it looks like magic to kids and copywriters. Measures 3-1/2" tall x 3-3/4" dia, with plenty of room for marshmallows. Dinosaurs loved marshmallows—that’s why a lot of them lived in marshes.

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$13.65 EACH

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