Nobody would dare vote you off the island if you have this stainless steel survival tool. Smaller than a credit card at 2-3/4" x 1-3/4", it has (11) functions: can opener, knife edge, flathead screwdriver, small ruler, bottle opener, 4-position wrench, saw blade, 2-position wrench and a couple more. Slip it into your wallet or hang it on your keychain, then go get lost.

It's a 10-tool Swissesque military survival knife, but without those red plastic handles to break and fall off. Includes stainless steel 2-1/2" knife blade, flathead driver/bottle opener, saw blade, scissors, can opener, fish scaler/nail set, corkscrew, Phillips driver, awl, nail file and the needle-like thing for making buckskin clothes in case you're lost for years. Has a split ring to hang your keys from.

This small, but mighty, 9-LED flashlight has a glow-in-the-dark switch so you can, duh, find it in the dark when you need it. Measures 4" long x approx 1" dia with a 4" wriststrap and the GITD push-button switch on the non-business end. Weather resistant. Comes with (3) "AAA" batteries. We'll pick one in brushed or anodized blue aluminum, silver, green camo or black.

Four carabiners, no waiting. These are for keys and stuff, not for hanging around Mt. Everest. We'll pick a quartet of 2-3/4" x 1-3/8" carabiners in assorted vibrant anodized-aluminum colors, including black and polished silver. They open to a max of 5/8" and each has a complimentary 7/8" slip-ring at absolutely no extra charge.

It will be if you buy this bright-as-a-Phi-Beta-Kappa COB LED 3W flashlight, with a bonus red laser. Measures a mere 4-3/4" x 1-1/8" dia and comes with (3) “AAA” batteries inside, where they belong. In a knurled aluminum body of a color that we’ll pick for you (gray, black, red or blue) because who cares what color a flashlight is. (Note: flashlight and pointer can't be on at the same time.)

This 6" long water bottle holder has a 2" aluminum carabiner and is attached to a 2-3/4” long canvas strap, with a 1” slip ring and a soft rubber planchette-like, plectrum-ish, egg-shaped thingie 2-3/8” long with a 15/16” hole in it. What for? Our Asst VP for Saying Planchette says that is the portion to slip over the top of the water bottle. The whole shebang is in a hard-to-lose neon green.

Carabiners. Little guys, 2” long x 1-1/8” that open to 7/16” max. In silver, with one flattened side, or in anodized red or green aluminum. You’ll get at least two colors in your 3-pack.

Nothing says camping tragedy like having no place to hang your water bottle when you're stalking elusive critters. This 2-5/8" assorted colors aluminum carabiner has a canvas strap with a rubber gasket on it to grab onto the top of your standard water bottle with a 7/8" cap. This makes it great for biking and hiking, too. Also has a slip ring for sundry other stuff.

Get our littlest pocket work-light. Just 2” x 1-3/16” x 3/4” with a single white intense COB LED, and (2) button-cell batteries (included), it’s about the size of a really thick domino tile. Has a little magnet on the back, too. You’ll get a pair in red, orange, green or blue.

Our each is a dozen unmarked anodized aluminum dog tags, 2" x 1-1/8", on a 3" ball chain. Colors include silver, gold, red, purple, blue and black. Nice for ID tags and ready to be engraved, or written on with indelible marker.

Misprints are our business. These bargain multitool pocket knives all have (removeable) 1" slip rings and measure from 3-3/8" to 3-1/2" long with misprinted promo messages on the side. Most will be red or blue anodized metal and will have 2" blades, flathead drivers/bottle openers, can openers, Phillips bits and the ever-useful corkscrew.

Our sunglasses all have dark-tinted polycarbonate lenses rated for 95 percent UV-B and 60 percent UV-A protection. You pick the black top-only frames with black or white arms (temple), or the solid black frames with assorted neon color arms (temple) that we’ll choose for you, to save you having to think about it.

Cute little keychain-size carabiners in cerise (that’s like an electric pink) anodized aluminum. They measure 2” x 1-1/8” and open to a max 7/16”. There are (2) per pack, so you’ll get (6) total but they’re not for climbing—only for hanging stuff.

Our hottest hot pink carabiner. Call it fuchsia, in honor of Leonard Fuchs, who discovered the flower of that color--which is a shade of dark pink. Measures, 3” long with “safe working load 150lbs” printed along its flattened fuchsia side. But it’s not for climbing, no matter how much you weigh.

Or giraffe, zebra, tiger or leopard. We’ll send you (3) of our animal-skin print aluminum carabiners, 3-1/8” long x 1-3/4” with a 5/8” mouth, in whatever critter-prints run to the door when we open the cage. Not for climbing. (Think: keys.)

A bright little flashlight with (8) super-bright white LEDs in a circle and a less-than-5mW red laser right in the middle. One click and it's a flashlight, another click and it's a laser pointer. (Note: flashlight and pointer can't be on at the same time.) Measures 4-3/8" long x 1-1/8" dia in assorted colors dark silver, red or blue aluminum with knurled grips at both ends. Lasts 30 hours on a set of new alkaline batteries (3 "AAA" heavy duty batteries included).

It was June 18-20 of 79,182,021 BCE. Luckily, we’ve got surplus promo key-chains, with 1” slip-rings attached to 1-3/8" x 1-5/8" fobs with the fest name and a nice picture of a T-rex, and at a deeply discounted price.

Return with me now to the Summer of Love when the girls wore flowers in their hair and everyone had a piece of twine around their wrists. We'll pick (20) authentic twine bracelets approx 12" long, and if you're lucky you just might get one with an actual painted bead woven into it.