Yes, your desktop is made of atoms (you, too) but this is a 7" dia chrome and black model of an atomic structure (Boronish, Paul says) that keeps on turning via the magic of electromagnetics, at least until the 9V battery you put in it wears out. Stands approx 9" tall on its base.  Ignore that "perpetual motion" on the box, unless you have a perpetual battery. Minimal assembly required, but a maximum person like you won't have a problem with it.

You never know when you might find yourself in a ramen noodle gang fight. This switchblade spork is 6-1/2" long and snaps open to 11". Has a pushbutton trigger switch and a sliding safety so you don't spork yourself by mistake. If Russ Tamblyn had had one of these, he might still be a Jet.

Geology for those with short attention spans? The original Magic Rocks®, of course! Mix the solution in a jar of water, drop in the pebbles, and watch them grow into a forest of multi-color stalagmites. Growth starts in 10 minutes, is impressive in 30 minutes, and complete (up to 4" tall) in 2 hours. Extra credit if you can make it grow stalactites by gluing the pebbles to the bottom of a jar, then pouring the solution in and turning it upside down. Who knows? Maybe it will work. Comes with a set of marine decals to decorate the jar. Definitely not for use with living fish. For ages 10 and up.

Special for your beginner tootler. Our black (ABS plastic) soprano recorder measures 12-5/8" long and includes a plastic carrying case, cleaning rod, and a sheet of fingering instructions.

From the world of gag gift boxes, this Hot Dog Homestead box has illustrations for a DIY house kit made out of (9) kinds of meat, including pate for plaster. Measures 11-1/2” x 9-3/4” x 3” deep and is meant to amuse folks before they open it to find their real gift inside. We here at the home office think you should pack it with, yes, (9) kinds of meat--for even more laughs.

Definitely not that other big green monster that ate the Pacific rim because he's been trademarked. This is just a 6" tall molded plastic green monster that happens to look just like him. (If coincidences didn't happen, there wouldn't be a name for them.) Oddzilla has movable arms, legs and tail.

Literally. These clear, plastic-tubing faux-specs start in your soda, wrap around your ears and eyes, sit on your nose and end up in your mouth. You slurp and your drink zips around your face and into your yap. The last word in sophisticated beverage consumption. Made of 1/8" and 1/4" tubing, the slurp-parts detach for when you're not drinking. Some folks here believe we got this, despite the fact that it's in perfect working order, because the package says "It's suck-sational!"

Go fly a kite. We highly recommend this rainbow-colored nylon parafoil version, measures 20" x 23" at its widest with a 14-foot tail (over three times longer than a tiger's) on a spindle with a couple hundred feet of string. Includes a carrying pouch, too, making it a very practical, portable parafoil.

Plunk your magic twanger and call yourself froggy. This 3-5/8" long steel jaw harp, or mouth harp, is technically a plucked idiophone, but don't say that in Nashville. Includes playing instructions. Pay no attention to that vibration in your head.

Sometimes you need a drone that will work with your phone, and, as always, you’ve come to the right place. The X5UW--FPV Real-Time Drone, a quad-rotor from Syma/Tenergy, features a 1MP photo/video camera that will send real-time video to your iPhone or Android, which will also act as the controller for the drone by just tilting it. Also has headless and flip modes and auto-hover. Measures approx 15” dia x 2-3/4” thick with a second rechargeable battery, so you get (2) 7-minute flights on each 2-hour charge. Comes with spare blades, a USB charger and a 16-page manual. You’ll need (4) “AA”s for the controller if you don’t use your phone, and you’ll need an SD card. Has 720P FPV (first-person view). For ages 12+.

By popular demand from every 12-year-old in our database, our remote-control rat is back, this time in a new, improved model with an infrared sensor on his little rat back. Measures an alarming 7-1/2” long (almost 11” with the tail) and is powered by (5) “AAA” batteries, which you’ll have to add, because it’s your rat. Improved 25-foot range will reach well into your mother’s walk-in closet or the teachers’ lounge. In luxurious black velour (another first), it runs straight ahead and spins backwards. The red LED eyes just add to the rodential verisimilitude.

This whimsical pack of (30) postcards measures, unsurprisingly, post-card size 5-3/4" x 3-15/16", with non-duplicating images of gravy and bacon, Nikola Tesla, narwhals, spontaneous human combustion, boxing kangaroos, infinity and taxidermy, among many others of that ilk. Those ilks. Whatever--just buy 'em and stop asking so many questions. Blurbs on the back.

Very much a classic magic trick set, but in a little 5-1/2” x 4” x 2-1/4” tin. Hardly seems possible, but it contains more than (25) tricks, including vase and ball, mystery computer, floating hearts, balls and cup, disappearing coin, nail box and a buncha card tricks. Includes a 32-page instruction booklet, too.

Titled "The Field and Forest Handy Book," this volume has been justifiably in print since 1906. Written by Daniel C. "Uncle Dan" Beard, the founder of the Sons of Daniel Boone and one of the founders of the BSA, it's a compendium of eternally relevant woodland lore, from building cabins, sleds, boats, and bridges to camping in swamps. The only part we skipped was on how to cook a muskrat. (We know a place that delivers.) Loaded with illustrations. In soft cover from David Godine's Nonpareil Books, 428 pages.

It’s called Thinking Putty® because while you do whatever you want with it, your brain relaxes and opens up to all kinds of creative thinking. Need it? Yes. And you can also knead it. Or bounce it, bend it, tear it, stretch it, snap it, pop it. Pick from the 3.2 oz of dark green magnetic Strange Attractor putty with iron filings infused in it, plus a 1/2” cubed rare earth magnet; the 3.2 oz glimmering light green Foxfire putty that you can draw on with the included blacklight keychain light; or the Super Scarab, 3.2 oz. of color-shifting blue/purple/copper/red putty reminesent of Egyptian scarabs. Comes in a 4” dia x 1-3/8” tin.

Introducing the Aeromax 2000. This update of the classic parachute toy has mesh under the canopy instead of lines, so it's tangle-free. Big 20" chute floats the little 3-1/2" tall trooper gently to the ground. In assorted colors, which we'll pick because we have really good color sense.

No wires, no batteries. Amaze your kids with this actual wooden puzzle. Semi-Tetris-ish, with (40) pieces that will take them a week to fit back into the 10-1/2” x 7” frame, and can also be used to make a bunch of different things. Called the Genius Puzzle, probably for reasons listed above. For ages 6+.

We're fresh out of weasels, and since you're a fan of foam ball poppers in general you probably already have our cow popper. Now try this unicorn popper! Stands 6-1/2" tall (it's a giant among lesser unicorns) and comes with (6) rainbow-colored foam balls, which is all they use in unicorn land.