This plush, ridiculously soft, polyester, faux fur robe works great straight out of the shower or in a ’70s lounge with your best platform heels. Unisex, like all great purple robes with two-tone brown collars and cuffs that look vaguely big cat-ish. Marked 3X, but we think it’s closer to L or XL. Measures a very manageable for all sizes 55” long. Put it on and you’ll instantly feel like a character in an old episode of Baretta. Priced at the very odd $22.73, but since it’s our first robe, complete with a classic belt tie, we’re happy to cut you a deal.

Jarvis Says: Mother's day is coming Add some Heated Massaging Slippers Here...Click

It’s back. Once upon a carnival, the bamboo back scratcher was the prize every kid came home with and there wasn’t an unscratched back in America--unless the kid came home with a goldfish, which are worthless for scratching backs. Now you can return to those thrilling days of yesteryear with our high-quality, 19” long bamboo back scratcher. Style may vary, but the relief your back feels won't, and you don’t even have to go to a carnival to get it. 

What scratches your back but won't provide breakfast for you? It's our glow in the dark back scratcher of course. Has chicken like talon "hands" and extends to over 26” long, but shrinks to a pocket-sized 8-1/4”. Super duper handy to have around when your significant other says they just cut their finger nails.

Critter beware! The best thing about these Ultrasonic Pest Reject critter repellers? You just plug them in and let them work their magic. You’ll get (4) of them, each offering 850-1300 square feet of protection (or 80-120 square meters if your bugs are Canadian). Each plug-in draws a paltry 3W of power and looks like a computer mouse that hangs from a standard outlet. Sends out a 22-65 kHz wave that scares away insects and rodents but is outside of most people's hearing range.

But it will still keep the flying critters out of your kitchen. This hanging screen is made of a plastic fabric mesh and will fit doorways up to 35” x 82”, but works best in slightly narrower ones to allow some side overlap. Works great on campers, RVs, trailers and the like where you really need to let air flow or buy four and build a giant insect cage that can cover a small tree. Installs with adhesive hook-and-loop tabs and has a weighted bottom, so it won’t flap in the wind. Portable, handy and ready for summer. Just like you.

The rubber bumps on the end of this rolling massager are in rows that rotate independently to rub you the right way. The (6) rubber bumps are in (7) 1-1/4” dia rows on a three-draw telescoping handle that extends from 13” to 23” long, so you can reach the soles of your feet or massage your cat. (Some cats like it, some don’t, so a little distance might be good.) Juanita uses hers for physical therapy.

From Conair® (the personal care products company, not the prison airline of movie fame), these ordinary-looking bedroom slippers are black with white plush trim and interiors, but have hidden heating elements and vibration massagers. The International Electric Slipper Association credits them with saving over 2.8 million marriages and relationships in this country alone in the past year. Size small/medium, which the box says means women's 6 - 9 or men's 4-1/2 – 7. So no Bigfoots, please. Includes an 8-foot power cord with a splitter that you plug into a wall socket, and into each slipper. Warmth and vibration are controlled by an in-line switch.

2-Pack ultrasonic pest repeller. Just plug in these 3-1/2" x 2-1/4" x 1" black or white devices that look like they were designed by the stealth bomber design team and the pests will flee. Package shows cockroaches, mosquitos, spiders, mice and ants and says to expect an increase of critter sightings at first as they scramble to get away from the noise only they can hear. Operates on a frequency that is inaudible to humans, 25-65KHz, works in 0-40°C (0-104°F) and lights up so you know it's running. Approx. 100' coverage per unit. It's recommended to place at least 12" above the floor and not behind any furniture that could block the sound.

Bandages in tins. We feel sorry for those flesh-colored bandages that are just trying to hide. Stand up and be healed with bandages that make a statement! Say Oink with this classic metal box of (15) sterile photo reproductions of a raw bacon slice, plus a bonus plastic pig in every tin.  

Not a mystery, but an actual way to scratch your skull. Looks like a $29.95 neo-whisk from Grate & Borrow, but it’s really our all-time favorite stainless steel scalp massager. (Also a mid-century modern metal sculpture if you stand it up on the coffee table, where it’s handy for cranio-itchy moments anyway.) Rocket-shaped handle leads to a dozen spring tines with little bubble ends for your scratching and massaging pleasure. Measures 9-1/2” long overall.