Managing people will be so much easier with this giant red NO! button on your desk, or at home. Push it and hear a digital voice deliver (10) different versions of no, including No!; No, No, No; Noooooo; For the last time, NO!; and more. Great for denying tasks at work, and later-bedtime requests at home. (Remember--you can always change your mind to Yes, but going the other way never works.) Measures 3-1/2" dia x 1-1/2" tall in red with a black frame. You add a pair of "AAA" batteries.
Emergency underpants in a can. Says it all, doesn't it? Quite stretchable in a Tyvekish white fabric, "one pair fits most adults." They're hip-hugger, semi-bikini, translucent type drawers, so despite the smiling man wearing them and a red bow-tie on the can, some (insecure) guys might find these just a touch jeune fille-ish. "Safe, Sanitary, Secure." Says so right on the 3" x 1-1/2" x 2/3" flip-top metal can. Better buy (3) in case of a long weekend.
Here's a replacement bag. We sell 'em by the pound: the half-pound bag will get you an assortment of approx 35 colorful glass marbles of various styles, ranging from 9/16" to 1-5/16" dia, although most of them will be the smaller sizes.
A plastic pistol shaped toy that shoots slugs of raw potato. Push the barrel into a potato, break off the slug, aim and shoot up to fifty feet. Loads of fun, environmentally harmless, and about as safe as any "projectile" toy can be!! Pulls apart for cleaning. For kids ages 5 and up.
is best done with the sacred mother of all novelty items, the original Whoopee Cushion. Marlon Brando owned one. Of course he did, they're both American classics, except the cushion was born in Toronto. Ours is the classic 8" version.
Here's a little music box to crank. These are really cute, with a very nice sound, and they're in clear acrylic cases so you, or impressionable youngsters, can watch them work. They measure 2-1/4"x 2" x 1-1/4" with a 7/8" crank. We'll pick one that plays When You Wish upon a Star, Row, Row, Row your Boat, Brahms' Lullaby, or Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star. We won't pick the one that plays the score from Die Walküre because the wheel is just enormous.
From the world of gag gift boxes, this Hot Dog Homestead box has illustrations for a DIY house kit made out of (9) kinds of meat, including pate for plaster. Measures 11-1/2” x 9-3/4” x 3” deep and is meant to amuse folks before they open it to find their real gift inside. We here at the home office think you should pack it with, yes, (9) kinds of meat--for even more laughs.
Or singing suppositories. The pair is very magnetic, whatever they are. The 1-3/4" long oblate spheroids look like highly polished black hematites. Hold them an inch apart in your palm, toss 'em into the air and listen to them make a sound like the cyber-crickets. Or an electrocuted chicken. The manufacturer suggests keeping these mega-magnets away from computers, pacemakers, TV sets and credit cards.
It could have been called an Alabama Buzzer after Alabama Vest, the man who invented it. Or a Clegghorn, after Thaddeus Von Clegg, the clock master who fabricated the first one. But the hand-crafted 4-3/4" long steel instrument was a simple amusement, and the 1840s were a simple time. So it's simply a kazoo.
For store hours, phone and directions, click here.
Or View Our Latest Printed Catalog Online
Our web site always contains everything we have available for sale outside our retail stores. Typically, new items are listed on the site before they get published in our catalog...
Unlike Any Place On Earth
In addition to this fabulous on-line catalog of incredible stuff, American Science & Surplus has three great retail locations. If you're in the neighborhood, please stop by! Store hours may vary. Feel free to call for store hours and directions.